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January 16, X
Weather: Sunny
I swear– (///￣皿￣)○～ –I will never let Wu YunFei, this sand sculpture, in my car again!
This morning, this guy suddenly said he wanted to drive me to the company. Without thinking, I immediately rejected him.
Street racing in the early morning? What a joke!
If the thousands of surveillance cameras along the streets were to snap a picture of us, instead of heading to work, I would spend my day at the Traffic Management Bureau.
Seeing my firm manner, he settled for the next best thing and asked me to drive him somewhere.
I looked at the map, saw that the place was more or less along the way, and agreed to his request.
When given a free ride, an ordinary person would be well-behaved in their seat and, at most, make small talk with the driver.
This guy failed to be well-behaved. He was restless from the moment he hopped in the car, touching here and there and everywhere. Bored after not finding anything new, he opened the small refrigerator in the back seat and took out a can of coke. Then, he began to shake it.
OTZ Now that I think about it, I should’ve stopped his mentally challenged behavior right then and there.
However, at that time, I was driving single-mindedly. It was a relief to see him finally settling down, playing with a coke in his hands.
If he had continued to toss the can from hand to hand, I might’ve been unable to bear it and scold him.
In short, I was looking forward to quickly getting to the destination so that this ADHD patient could leave my car.
In the end, we didn’t even arrive before this guy did something that forced me to change the directions.
No one will believe it when I say this, but he unwittingly opened the ring pull, forgetting that he had just shook the can a moment ago.
Seriously, no one over the age of three will do this!
And he’s almost thirty years old, ah!
The outcome is obvious; my car was drenched in coke.
Since I was sitting in the driver’s seat, my situation wasn’t that bad; only some coke got on my coat. This guy, however, looked as if he had gotten fished out of a coke pool, his hair dripping with soda.
I wanted to reproach him at first, but couldn’t bear to do so after seeing his pitiful appearance.
Finally, the tens of thousands of words in my mind condensed into one sentence, “You’re an idiot!”
Maybe he realized he did something wrong, but this guy unexpectedly didn’t refute. Instead, he blushed and lowered his head.
Hehe, he also knows how to be shy?
Ai, in any case, my full-time attendance award for this month has slipped away.
I looked at the miserable condition of my car. Since I’ll be late anyway, I may as well go all the way and ask for a whole day off!
A whole day!
I was trembling as I sent my request for a leave of absence, my heart beating like a drum… I could already imagine the mouthful I would get from the board of directors tomorrow. QAQ
Upon seeing my suffering, this guy not only didn’t feel guilty, he also laughed at me for asking for leave like an elementary-schooler despite being an adult.
(十▔皿▔)凸 If it wasn’t for him, I would’ve gotten full-time attendance this month!
Does he think that everyone is a lazy hedonist like him?
I am a proper working man!
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However, even if I was angry, I couldn’t just stop the car on the road and argue with him while waiting for the coke-drenched seats to air dry.
So, I suppressed the anger in my heart, found the nearest 4S shop, and left the car there for them to handle.
Since both of us were people often on the news, we were quickly recognized upon entering the store, which made me even more upset.
Who would want to get recognized in such an embarrassing situation?
However, out of politeness, I managed to squeeze out a smile and tried to maintain an amiable and friendly bearing.
At that moment, I looked at Wu YunFei from the corner of my eyes.
Although his face was calm and collected, he looked as if someone owed him millions in cash. He exuded a low pressure from head to toe, like he wasn’t the sand sculpture who just played with a can of coke a moment ago.
I was suddenly struck with the idea to use him as an excuse to get away.
I don’t know if it was just an illusion, but when my attention returned to him, his mood seemed to brighten instantly. Although he still sported a long face, the corner of his mouth subconsciously perked up slightly.
In order to prevent more people from coming over and causing a scene, I quickly took him out of the 4S store.
After leaving that place, this guy couldn’t maintain his serious expression, and laughed as he held his stomach.
He said I acted just like an old officer, not at all like a young man in his twenties.
He also that that we were traffic stars1 even though he was basically an unemployed vagrant and I, a small-time company employee.
I was relieved to see him finally in a good mood.
Before, when I saw his calm face, I thought he was unhappy because people were taking pictures of his sorry figure.
When I mentioned this, he pulled out his phone and showed me his verified Weibo.
I then found out that he was actually a verified fashion blogger?!
No wonder he always wears such strange clothes!
He told me that, as a fashion blogger, anything he wore could be interpreted as fashion. Even if he told everyone that he was soaked in coke, it would be taken as an art statement.
Emmm, I really don’t understand these fashionistas.
Whatever, as long as he’s happy…
To be on the safe side, instead of going to a large shopping mall, we headed to a roadside clothing store.
To be honest, it was my first time going into such a small store.
I thought the quality of the clothes in this store wouldn’t be good, but surprisingly, both the cutting and materials were not bad.
This guy told me that many stores like this were personal studios, and the clothes inside were designed and tailored by the owners themselves. Although they couldn’t compare to some big brands and private custom-made services, these stores were the best choice for fashionistas like him.
When the storekeeper heard what he said, she looked as if she regretted not having met him sooner.
She said that the quality of her clothes were especially good; they wouldn’t tear even if you did the Thomas Flares2.
An average person would take this as an exaggerated metaphor and laugh it off. I didn’t expect this sand sculpture to take what she said seriously–he replied that Thomas Flares were too difficult for him, but other gymnastic moves were doable.
I thought I misheard, but this guy actually did a whole set of gymnastic moves in the small store…
I was starting to suspect that he had a thing for the storekeeper. Otherwise, how could he do such a shameful thing in broad daylight?
Confused, I watched as they became mutuals on Weibo before my eyes.
The sand sculpture told the shopkeeper that if she wanted to post the video she just shot on Weibo, she must remember to tag him so he could help promote it.
In response, the shopkeeper became super happy. She had an enthusiastic, hopeful look on her face as she repeatedly thanked the sand sculpture.
The sand sculpture also looked quite happy, though I don’t know how such a shameful video could make him happy.
Maybe he really likes the shopkeeper… For a beauty’s smile, this guy can really do anything crazy!
Translator’s Notes:
1. traffic star: term used in China for celebrities who are very popular and have a large fanbase ↩
2. Acrobatic move. Read more here. ↩
Naeda’s Log: (semi-edited) Do people actually use gymnastic moves to measure how good clothes are??? lmao
Side-Note: “I wanted to reproach him at first, but couldn’t bear to do so after seeing his pitiful appearance.” It seems like YunFei just needs to bat his eyes and look pitiful for a sec to make Feng Yao forgive him for almost anything. (*cough*whipped*cough*)
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